Welcome to the new and hopefully improved Commissioner Commentary. Yahoo message boards have been ditched in favor of a format where I can post things consistently and edit my embarrassing spelling and grammar.
Man, what a brutal week for the NFL's skill players. Jordy, Bilal Powell, Kelce, Clay, Bradford, Diggs, and the NY Giants entire receiving corps left their prospective games this week. I almost put Terrance West in there too, but I don't know if he qualifies as a skill player ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Recaps
Chunky Salsa(125.36) > travis's Team(74.14)
Chunky Salsa is back in first, and claims the high score of the week with a ridiculous 3 TDs in 4 catches from Hopkins and career game from Melvin Gordon. Travis got a good game from Dak, but 0 points from a RB who didn't practice all week and -3 from Houston's defense (tip to the rest of league: don't play defenses vs KC. They're crazy), so this game was never particularly close. The only complaint Chunky can lodge is that he missed out on the high score of the season by .22 points. Oh well.
- High Score of the week, Chunky Salsa
Rodgers That 🏈💪 (91.84) > (74.54)
This was never going to be a pretty week for triple facepalm with so many players on bye, but this was still a surprisingly low score for her team. She can blame new pickup Latavius Murray, Abdullah, and Titans "quarterback" Matt Cassel for that. Rodgers That was led by her namesake QB again and a crazy high scoring game from 200 year old kicker Adam Vinatieri. Rodgers That now sits just outside the playoff picture one spot behind
- Pickup of the week, Adam Vinatieri. I know he's a kicker, andsome most of that is luck, but you could not have picked a better week to play him considering he had yet to top 8 points this season. In a game decided by 16 points, a 12 point advantage at the K position is a big deal
Perezoso Majestuoso (103.86) > Greg's Grand Team (69.20)
It took 5 weeks, but our last undefeated team has finally fallen. With 3 of his players on bye and Todd Gurley finally putting up a dud week, you might think GGT had no chance in this matchup. But midway through the afternoon games this weekend he was actually projected to win until Leonard Fournette ripped off the fastest run of the season for a 90 yard touchown. (The NFL measures those stats now. Pretty neat, huh?). Perezoso is going to be nervously watching his player notes this week though, as 2 of his starters were listed in the injury recap up top. On the plus side, Davante Adams is back from his brutal hit last week and looked great. Perezoso climbs into 3rd as GGT slides down into 2nd.
Colton's Team (73.76) > last shall be 1st 😜 (56.48)
Don't look now, but Colton is actually on a winning streak, despite putting up one of the lowest scores of the week. In any case, a win is a win, and he's only one game away from .500, relying on a big game from Alex Smitch, and decent ones from Marshawn and Landry. Last shall be first, I've picked on you the last few weeks, but I honestly feel terrible about how bad your team has become. Pour one out for Odell's ankle and Clay's knee, and blame the rest of it on Roethlisberger's disgusting 0TDs/5INTs. I hope there are better weeks ahead for you. (Maybe a better quarterback?)
- Low score of the season, last shall be 1st
- Lowest scoring winner, Colton's Team
🤓🖒🏈 (105.72) > Zane's Team (79.12)
If there's one big reminder we got this week, it's that AJ Green is still an elite WR in the NFL, putting up close to 200 yards and a TD vs a good pass defense in Buffalo. Good games from breakout top tier TE Ertz and "actually not terrible" Cleveland Brown Duke Johnson gave 🤓🖒🏈 a comfortable win over Zane this week, pushing him down into 4th. For Zane's team, Zeke looked good again but Wilson fell back down to earth, and backup Bucs TE OJ Howard (???) failed to register a single catch. 🤓🖒🏈 is now back in playoff position.
- Highest scoring loser, Zane's Team
There are a TON of 3-2 or 2-3 teams currently, so expect the leaderboard to continue shaking up for the next few weeks. Oh yeah. The Longhorns also didn't lose to K-State this year. Just thought I would throw that in there
Man, what a brutal week for the NFL's skill players. Jordy, Bilal Powell, Kelce, Clay, Bradford, Diggs, and the NY Giants entire receiving corps left their prospective games this week. I almost put Terrance West in there too, but I don't know if he qualifies as a skill player ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Recaps
Chunky Salsa(125.36) > travis's Team(74.14)
Chunky Salsa is back in first, and claims the high score of the week with a ridiculous 3 TDs in 4 catches from Hopkins and career game from Melvin Gordon. Travis got a good game from Dak, but 0 points from a RB who didn't practice all week and -3 from Houston's defense (tip to the rest of league: don't play defenses vs KC. They're crazy), so this game was never particularly close. The only complaint Chunky can lodge is that he missed out on the high score of the season by .22 points. Oh well.
- High Score of the week, Chunky Salsa
Rodgers That 🏈💪 (91.84) > (74.54)
This was never going to be a pretty week for triple facepalm with so many players on bye, but this was still a surprisingly low score for her team. She can blame new pickup Latavius Murray, Abdullah, and Titans "quarterback" Matt Cassel for that. Rodgers That was led by her namesake QB again and a crazy high scoring game from 200 year old kicker Adam Vinatieri. Rodgers That now sits just outside the playoff picture one spot behind
- Pickup of the week, Adam Vinatieri. I know he's a kicker, and
Perezoso Majestuoso (103.86) > Greg's Grand Team (69.20)
It took 5 weeks, but our last undefeated team has finally fallen. With 3 of his players on bye and Todd Gurley finally putting up a dud week, you might think GGT had no chance in this matchup. But midway through the afternoon games this weekend he was actually projected to win until Leonard Fournette ripped off the fastest run of the season for a 90 yard touchown. (The NFL measures those stats now. Pretty neat, huh?). Perezoso is going to be nervously watching his player notes this week though, as 2 of his starters were listed in the injury recap up top. On the plus side, Davante Adams is back from his brutal hit last week and looked great. Perezoso climbs into 3rd as GGT slides down into 2nd.
Colton's Team (73.76) > last shall be 1st 😜 (56.48)
Don't look now, but Colton is actually on a winning streak, despite putting up one of the lowest scores of the week. In any case, a win is a win, and he's only one game away from .500, relying on a big game from Alex Smitch, and decent ones from Marshawn and Landry. Last shall be first, I've picked on you the last few weeks, but I honestly feel terrible about how bad your team has become. Pour one out for Odell's ankle and Clay's knee, and blame the rest of it on Roethlisberger's disgusting 0TDs/5INTs. I hope there are better weeks ahead for you. (Maybe a better quarterback?)
- Low score of the season, last shall be 1st
- Lowest scoring winner, Colton's Team
🤓🖒🏈 (105.72) > Zane's Team (79.12)
If there's one big reminder we got this week, it's that AJ Green is still an elite WR in the NFL, putting up close to 200 yards and a TD vs a good pass defense in Buffalo. Good games from breakout top tier TE Ertz and "actually not terrible" Cleveland Brown Duke Johnson gave 🤓🖒🏈 a comfortable win over Zane this week, pushing him down into 4th. For Zane's team, Zeke looked good again but Wilson fell back down to earth, and backup Bucs TE OJ Howard (???) failed to register a single catch. 🤓🖒🏈 is now back in playoff position.
- Highest scoring loser, Zane's Team
There are a TON of 3-2 or 2-3 teams currently, so expect the leaderboard to continue shaking up for the next few weeks. Oh yeah. The Longhorns also didn't lose to K-State this year. Just thought I would throw that in there
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