Week 1 2018: Browns "Break" The Losing Streak

For the first time since 2016, the Cleveland Browns played a football game without losing. Did they benefit from six turnovers? Yes. Did they have their game winning FG blocked? Technically yes. But hey, it's progress. Right?

In Fantasy Football world, this weekend generated some insane scoring thanks in no small part to the  New Orleans/Tampa Bay shootout. Baltimore, the Jets (???), Rams, and Chiefs also put up huge offensive numbers that boosted many of our teams to landslide victories.

*a note on the gifs: I just google search the players so the odds that they're actually footage from this week is incredibly unlikely

Recaps

Michael Thomas

Cool Beans (142.64) > Eagle Powers (95.16)

I don't know if I have ever seen a single game so completely dominate a matchup as the Saints loss to the Bucs this week. Kamara and Thomas combined for 75 points, while their nonexistent defense put up -4 points for Eagle Powers, dropping him into an almost 80 point hole he had no chance to climb out of. Eagle Powers got good games from Gurley and a finally healthy Andrew Luck, but it wasn't nearly enough.

- biggest margin of victory (47 points)
- pickup of the week: James Conner (Eagle Powers)

Julio Jones

zane's Team (126.62) > Greg's Grand Team (91.08)

A 29 point game from Julio put zane out into an early lead on Thursday before weak games from his starting RBs tightened the matchup on Sunday. Luckily for him, hyper efficient Chris Thompson turned in a 21 point game on 5 carries to put the matchup out of reach. GGT suffered another painful week 1 injury, losing Fournette mid-game after losing David Johnson in last year's first week. The good news is that the coach is "optimistic" that the injury is in a "good part of the leg" whatever that means. Joe Mixon also proved the haters wrong by dominating the Bengals backfield for a big week.

-lowest scoring winner, zane's Team

Drew Brees

Goofy Gang (159.56) > Return of the Mack (114.90)

Back in the league and straight into first place, Goofy Gang won in one of the week's many landslide victories. Drew Brees went nuclear on the TB defense, Kenny Stills actually did something for once, and rookie Saquan Barkley silenced his doubters with a huge 68 yard TD. A miserable 3 INT game from Roethlisberger weighed down Mack's team even with good performances from his starting RBs and WRs. 115 points is probably a good enough score to net you several wins this season, but not this week.

- high score of the week (and year) Goofy Gang

Tyreek Hill

Wampus Cats (128.34) > Represent 👩🏈🌻(120.62)

Tyreek Hill is a sentient robot created for the sole purpose of dominating NFL defenses. That's my working theory until proven otherwise. His ridiculous 44 points were enough to lift Wampus Cats past Represent despite terrible games from Stafford, Burton, and Hunt. On the other side of the ball, Jay Ajayi and Keenan Allen put in major work to put Represent at the top of the loser standings, and losing Greg Olsen doesn't look quite as painful when you have Kittle sitting on your bench.

- highest scoring loser, Represent 👩🏈🌻

Emmanuel Sanders

Steven's Team (125.54) > Dakstreek Boys (106.34)

What a painful week for Dakstreet Boys. The Bills offense held McCoy back by proving to be even worse than fans anticipated, Delaine Walker is out for the season, the Chargers D scored them negative points, and a 31 year old Sanders dominated on Sunday for with 27 points. It's not all sunshine for Steven's team either, however, as both Baldwin and Goodwin went down to injury this week. Maybe it's time to start looking at some waiver WRs?